First of all, you're not alone! Many, many people with vaginas struggle to climax during penetrative sex.

A Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy study in 2017 found that nearly 37% of women required clitoral stimulation to orgasm. Only 18% of women could cum during penetrative sex. An analysis of over 30 studies performed over the past 80 years, found only 25% of women are consistently reaching orgasm during vaginal sex.

So let go of any guilt you have and let's get to know your body so you can give yourself some earth shattering orgasms. Once you know how to bring yourself to orgasm, you can bring that experience into the bedroom with your partner.

The Difference between G-Spot and Clitoral Orgasms

One thing that everyone can agree on in this day and age, is that all bodies are different – inside and out. Orgasm, particularly the female orgasm, is a difficult thing to study, so it's no surprise that experts are still a little unsure on the science behind it all. Some women can orgasm in one way, but not another, while some can have many types of orgasms all at once. There really is no right or wrong way!

Trying to obtain an orgasm can be frustrating, particularly if you're not sure where to start. It's important to remember that what works for someone else might not work for you, and if you're aiming to achieve your first orgasm, it might take a bit of experimenting!

Clitoral orgasms are, for most women, the easiest to consistently achieve. The clitoris is located at the front of the female vulva, beneath what is known as the clitoral hood. When aroused, the clitoris will usually swell up and become a lot more sensitive.

Try rubbing and squeezing the folds of skin that surround the clitoris. This is an indirect method of stimulating it, so you don't need to actually touch the area! Try experimenting with different pressure, movements, and areas to find what you like best. Using very soft, light movements across the clitoris can also feel great. For this technique, your finger should be barely touching the clitoris, just lightly running across it in small movements. Use lots of lubricant!

Uberlube Luxury Lubricant 50ml$121.95Shop Now

If you're still struggling to achieve a clitoral orgasm alone or with a partner, there are a range of vibrators created exactly to help with that! There are now some really amazing clitoral stimulators on the market like the Satisfyer Pro 2.0. Just position the nozzle around your clitoris and chose from 11 levels of earth-shattering stimulation. It’s quiet as a mouse when it’s in the right place and the body friendly silicone is easy to clean as well as feeling just right.

Its magnetic USB charging cable makes it easy to charge and given the toy is known to give an incredibly quick orgasm, you don’t have to charge often! This new model is stronger, quieter and is the most sophisticated toy yet. Its soft rose gold casing makes it sexy and stylish. The head of the Satisfyer Pro 2.0 is wider and bigger to fit every clitoris and to make it easier to hit the spot.

Satisfyer Pro 2 Generation 2$337.95Shop Now

You can also try a lay-on vibe if the Satisfyer Pro 2.0 is too much stimulation. Both can be used before penetrative sex to get you really turned on, as part of foreplay.

The exact location of the G-spot can vary between women. Some believe that the G-spot is an enlarged clitoris, or that its nerve endings are attached to the clitoris.Start by spreading your legs and slowly inserting two fingers inside your vagina. With your palm facing up, press your fingertips against the center of the upper vaginal wall. The G-spot area should feel slightly ridged, like the roof of your mouth. Once you think you've located it, trying playing around with different pressures and movements! The classic "come hither" movement can be perfect for targeting this area.

If you can't find your G-spot, try using a toy. These two vibrators are designed to directly target the G-spot with their slightly curved ends. The Neon Luv Touch and Neon Luv Slender are both waterproof, multispeed, and coated with a super-silky coating, meaning they are perfect for beginners!

Neon Luv Touch G-spot Vibrator$67.95Shop Now Waterproof Neon Luv Slender G Vibrator$112.95Shop Now

After you've become successful at climaxing on your own, try some couple toys during penetrative sex.

Toys to help during penetrative sex

It can be hard to stimulate the clitoris and G-spot while being penetrated. Luckily there are heaps of toys that can help, and even some that can do all three! Revolutionize your love life with Tara - the premium couples massager that promises mind-blowing sensations for both him and her. Worn during penetrative sex, Tara combines the dual pleasures of vibrations and rotations within, offering completely new sensations unlike any you have shared before.

Lelo Tara Couples Massager$1034.95Shop Now

The Couples' Rabbit delivers powerful clitoral and G-Spot stimulation for her, while allowing for comfortable partner penetration from him. The Powerful rabbit ears tickle and tease her clitoris while the toy is ergonomically designed for G-Spot stimulation.

The Rabbit Company - The Couples' Rabbit$1484.95Shop Now

The Vibrating Couples Ring by OVO is placed around the penis before penetrative sex. Its discrete motor brings the most powerful vibration to the most sensitive of body parts. Three exciting patterns and three power levels lets every couple find the perfect sensation for their fun. Looking for some fun in the shower or bath? Then this is the perfect waterproof toy for your fun!

Ovo A2 Rechargeable Ring$337.95Shop Now

Don't forget foreplay

Foreplay is absolutely vital to get you in the mood. If you're not sure what to do - or you're feeling shy, a foreplay or romance kit can help. The Kama Sutra Feel Me kit is perfect for those who have always wanted to try something a bit more adventurous in the bedroom but weren't sure where to start. It's ideal for lovers who would like to experiment bondage play Couples who would like to learn how to master different sex positions Collect all four limited-edition play-sets! The Kama Sutra getaway kit is another great choice.

Feel Me Playset$157.95Shop Now

Consider playing an adult board game to get you both excited. The Lust! Card Game allows you to explore both romantic and physical intimacy with your partner. Each game ends with a unique love-making experience because there are over 30,000 possibilities within the Love-Making Cards. Play the XXX sex game by making your way around the board performing raunchy and seductive foreplay actions on each other.

Lust! Card Game$49.95Shop Now

Lets F*ck!$76.95Shop Now

There are also bondage kits if you think you'd enjoy that or kits that come with multiple toys.

The Rabbit Company - Lay-on Rabbit Couples Playtime Set$899.95Shop Now Ravish Me Couples Kit$206.95Shop Now

Want more?

Adulttoymegastore is an online retailer of sex toys distributing across New Zealand, Australia and the USA. ATMS was opened in 2009 and is still proudly New Zealand owned and operated, with over 8,000 products from more than 45 brands to choose from! We take great provide in providing the best products to thousands of happy customers, and have many benefits such as a loyalty programme, free samples with every order, and personalised notes.

Adulttoymegastore has a huge range of sex toys including vibrators, dildos and cock rings for every occasion! With fast, 100% discreet shipping, and price guarantee, ATMS has everything you need to make good sex, great!